WASTING TIME: May 2009

Friday, May 29, 2009

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

DAN DEACON

AND HIS TOUR DIARY..

Sunday, May 24, 2009

PIGEON LADY

We have our very own pigeon lady who likes to leave old rotting food along the sidewalk near our apartment. This time she has placed what is left of a birthday cake for the pigeons to enjoy.

Friday, May 22, 2009

YES.

THERE IS SOMEONE YACKING ALL OVER THE BEDROOM FLOOR. (AND NO SONIC YOUTH TONIGHT)

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

ATTN GUYS: WOLF T-SHIRTS GET YOU LAID.

By B. Govern "Bee-Dot-Govern" (New Jersey, USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)
This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.

WE'RE STILL ALRIGHT

FROM THE TEST PATTERNS SHOW. I HELPED DO THE DOOR FOR A BIT AND SOME GIRL COMPLAINED ABOUT HER BOYFRIEND NOT PUTTING HER ON THE LIST FOR HER OWN BOYFRIEND'S SHOW.